Summer Movie Round-Up: June Edition

Despite a big fat hole in the release schedule due to the delay of "Fast & Furious 7", June still pumped out a few winners - and one enormous turd.


Edge of Tomorrow

The last movie from Tom Cruise was the dopey and derivative, but fun and visually stunning "Oblivion".  "Edge of Tomorrow" is also quite derivative, but leaves the dopiness behind.  It's a nearly perfect summer sci-fi movie, full of breathless action, touching human drama, perfectly done humor, and filled to the brim with cool ideas and visual pizzazz.  The only drawback, for me, was the way it ends.  It's slightly unsatisfying, and I'm not even sure I understand exactly what happened, but it's not nearly enough to mar the rest of the film.  I recommend it.

P.S. - Never has Cruise's patented "shit-eating grin" been used to such good effect as it is here.  And Bill Paxton rules all.


The Fault in Our Stars

Oh no, a movie based on a Young Adult novel!  And it's about cancer patients who fall in love with each other!  Alert!  ALERT!!

Okay, it's not terrible, you just need to be an incredible softie to dig it.  And you can't be afraid of sad movies that jigger your waterworks, budge your boo-hoo, or Niagara your nose.  Wait. .  what?  It's overly wide-eyed, filled with hamfisted dialogue and subplots that go nowhere, yet remains surprisingly effective and adult.  The two lead actors (Shailene Woodley and Ansel Elgort) are capable performers and the director does a good job of (mostly) avoiding the too-obviously manipulative clichés of the genre.  If you have to watch it, don't be afraid - it's not bad at all.


22 Jump Street

The first "Jump Street" was one of my favorite movies of 2012, and this superior sequel will be one of my faves of 2014.  Channing Tatum and Jonah Hill continue their sickeningly sweet bromance in this fantastic, witty sequel which not only parodies action/buddy cop movies (as the original film did) but sequels in general.  It's self-aware and it knows it, yet never becomes too clever for the room, trading pretentiousness for earnest laughs.  Phil Lord and Chris Miller have hit my funny bone square-on four times in a row so far with the "Jump Street" movies, "Cloudy With a Chance of Meatballs" and "The Lego Movie".  With two of the funniest movies of '14 under their belt, it will be hard for another filmmaker to top their winning streak.  Highly, highly enjoyable stuff.


How to Train Your Dragon 2

Here's another sequel to one of my Favorite Movies, and it is also a very worthy follow-up.  For some reason I can't quite fathom, it isn't doing nearly as well at the box office as its predecessor, but it matters naught  - I wholeheartedly recommend this fantastic fiery fantasy flick to one and all.  What really strikes me about this franchise, aside from its open-heartedness and its showcasing of dragons (which are cool), are the surprisingly mature story and character touches which crop up unexpectedly now and again, much like when the character of Hiccup loses his leg in the climactic sequence of the original film.  There are a couple more in "2" which I won't spoil, but they are emotional beats and themes that you just don't see in mainstream animated fare.  The only aspect which keeps this movie from being as good as the first "Dragons" is the action scenes.  They're not quite as punchy and exciting as the original's, but they're still quite great.  Overall, it's a fine sequel.


The Signal

I won't talk much about this movie, and I suggest you refrain from viewing the trailers if you wish to see this.  I recommend checking this movie out, but with some caveats.  More on those later.

What is "The Signal", you ask?  Well, it's an independent sci-fi film from director William Eubank, if that's any help to you at all.  It starts off as a road movie and then gets all weird and science-fictiony.  There are twists.  There are turns.  In the end, when all's said and done, the movie isn't entirely satisfying.  It's derivative, it's a bit of a cheat, yet still I recommend checking it out if you have some extra time.  Up until the last section of the movie, it's a weird, visually spectacular, surprising ride. 

At any rate, it's better than "Transcendence".  Take that for what it's worth.


Willow Creek

Now it's time to review a found footage horror movie directed by Bobcat Goldthwait.

Yes.  Bobcat Goldthwait.

He's become an interesting director in his own right, but his genre of choice has historically been Dark Comedy, so when I initially heard that he would be making a found footage movie about a couple of people searching for bigfoot, I assumed it would also be Dark Comedy.  While there are certainly some laughs to be found in the movie, it's mostly a serious "Blair Witch" kind of a deal, with a nice slow burner of plot designed to lull you into forgetting that it's supposed to be scary - then makes you crap your pants with fear.  Okay, maybe it's not that scary.  It's a modest, solid little flick with some very well done sound design and a couple of decent lead performances (from Bryce Johnson and Alexis Gilmore), but it won't change your world or anything.  It's a nice little low budget diversion from all of the flashy science fiction films assaulting your summertime senses, and I recommend it for horror fans who like their scares implied rather than in-your-face.  Bobcat done good.


Transformers: Age of Extinction

Two words to describe this movie:  Aggressively Stupid.

This is Michael Bay's final Transformers movie, thank the gods.  I loved the cartoon series from the '80's (and the toys that inspired it) and I always thought that the characters and mythology from the show could, in the right hands, result in a truly great modern retelling.  Instead, we have this crappy new franchise (produced by Steven Spielberg, for shame), chock full of indecipherable action sequences, overstuffed plots, paper-thin characters, unfunny humor, overly human-centric stories, and more casual racism/sexism than you can shake a sexually frustrated frat boy at.  To be fair, "Age of Extinction" isn't the worst movie in the series - that honor goes to the second movie "Revenge of the Fallen" - but I did find AOE to be the most frustrating movie in the series, for a few reasons.  It's three hours long and full of extraneous characters and absolutely useless "plot" (just kill the bad guys already!).  The blatant product placement and the obvious pandering to China is, well, stupidly amusing, I must admit, but ridiculous.  The Dinobots (my #1 reason for seeing this movie) don't even show up until the final half hour and are completely mishandled.  Heck, I'm not even sure what they're supposed to be in this series.  Prime mentions something about them being ancient knights of Cybertron or some crap, but it's all very badly written and I don't understand what was wrong with using the same origins they had in the cartoon.  Plus, they never talk and have no discernible character traits.  Auuggh.

The movie does have good points - it's true!  The aforementioned indecipherable action sequences basically improved with the introduction of 3-D in the third movie "Dark of the Moon".  I had no problem following the action in AOE.  Then there's the villain named Lockdown.  He is, I feel, the best, most fully realized Transformer character in the new series, which is admittedly faint praise, but whenever the guy was off screen I was waiting for him to return.  He's like Boba Fett, but with a personality.  He's far more enjoyable to watch than Bay's Optimus Prime, who's still a grumpy asshole.  Finally, we have Shia LeBoef's replacement, Mark Wahlberg - he's far less annoying, but pretty much just a blank slate with muscles.

I haven't even mentioned the many gaping plot holes or terrible lines of dialogue.  My Favorite Line of Crappy Dialogue:  When Walhberg's family farm is invaded by black-clad government agents, Wahlberg asks Lead Agent if they have a warrant to search his place.  Lead Agent replies, "My face is my warrant."  Son of a bitch, that's awful.  That's it.  I'm done with these Transformers movies.

Until the next one, because Unicron and the Quintessons are probably going to be in it.  I'm so hopeless.


- The Movie of June -

It's "22 Jump Street".  "Edge of Tomorrow" is a very close second, but "Jump Street" has a better ending.

Summer Movie Round-Up: May Edition

Now that June has passed us by and the patriotic party time of July is upon us, it's time to reflect upon the films I saw in May - as usual, I am one step behind.  Let us proceed. . .


The Amazing Spider-Man 2

I didn't much like ASM1 - it was too soon to reboot the story (and retell the same old plot points in the same old way), the Lizard was mishandled, the tone was dull (I know, I know, they were attempting to capture the Dark Knight trilogy's seriousness and realism), I don't like Peter Parker's reinterpretation as a skateboard-riding hipster, and it just felt so - corporate.  But Andrew Garfield and Emma Stone were great in their respective roles, bringing a little life into something D.O.A. (Denis Leary was also good).  Well, ASM2 doesn't change my opinion all that much.  Garfield and Stone are still great, but the movie still retreads old story (the Green Goblin stuff), Parker is still a hipster, the villains are still mishandled, and the serious tone is now mixed with an over-the-top "Batman Forever"-style tone that makes for some serious unevenness.  Additionally, the movie is overcrowded with "stuff" (a total corporate move) and, in the end, just feels unsatisfying.  On the plus side, the action sequences are quite good, and there are a couple of really well done dramatic scenes here and there, but the musical score is kind of annoying.  And the Rhino is barely in the movie.

It's a mixed bag all around.


Neighbors

From out of left field comes this little comedy gem, a total surprise.  It's not groundbreaking or anything, but I laughed plenty of times, hard.  Part neighbor feud comedy, part frat party extravaganza, all rude, crude and over-the-top hilarious.  Seth Rogen is hit-or-miss with me, but here he's all hit.  Zak Efron, on the other hand, has been all miss until now - he's the big surprise of the movie.  Throw in a couple of great supporting performances (I'm thinking of Rose Byrne and Dave Franco in particular), lots of crude, dirty gags and a surprisingly emotional undercurrent, and you have a movie that is well worth your time - if you're a fan of lowbrow humor.  I am.


Godzilla

See my review if you want to know what I think.  It's flawed, but I love it.  I've seen it four times already.  Four.  Times.  It holds up.


Maleficent

I don't like the whole "Postmodern Fairy Tale" genre.  It may not be because of the genre itself, it may just have to do with the fact that I've been annoyed by almost every movie or T.V. show that it's spawned - Tim Burton's "Alice in Wonderland", "Once Upon a Time", "Grimm", "Snow White and the Huntsman", "Jack the Giant Slayer", "Red Riding Hood", "Hansel and Gretel:  Witch Hunters", "Sleepy Hollow", ad nauseum.  "Frozen," if it counts, is the only one I can think of that I liked (or maybe Tim Burton's 1999 "Sleepy Hollow").  Otherwise, it's just "ooh, it's the classic fairy tale, but with a twist!"  It's gritty!  It's "Lord of the Rings"-y!  What if the villain was really the good guy?  Oooooooh!  Which brings us to "Maleficent"  It's a little grittier.  It's definitely "Lord of the Rings"-y.  And the villain turns out to be not so bad after all.  It's not the worst of the bunch, but it's not very good, either.  Angelina Jolie has her occasional shining moments in her portrayal of the title role and the movie certainly looks good in terms of both cinematography and visual effects, but it's clearly the work of a first time director - it's highly inconsistent in both plot and tone, the humor is terribly forced and unfunny, and the movie feels abbreviated and undercooked.  It's not the worst movie of the month, but it is definitely a disappointment.


A Million Ways to Die in the West

Seth Macfarlane comes up with some really funny stuff now and again (I'm thinking mainly of "Family Guy" and "Ted").  Usually, though, you have to sit through plenty of unfunny jokes and lots of bland storylines and characters to get to them.  The same applies to this movie, his latest directorial effort:  It's comprised of a small handful of uproarious jokes surrounded by plenty of lame bodily function/80's nostalgia/modern pop culture-oriented jokes wrapped within a reverent Western setting and conveyed by earnest, but bland, guest stars who are playing bland character archetypes in a bland archetypical Western tale.  Did I mention 'bland'?   I recommend seeing this only if all of the truly funny movies of the year aren't available (such as "The LEGO Movie", "Neighbors", "22 Jump Street", or "Transformers: Age of Extinction", which is full of unintentional hilarity), or if you're planning on skimming through Facebook at the same time.


Blended

Why oh why did I see this damn movie?  Am I sick in the head or something?  After the utter hellish torture of "Grown Ups 2" (and most of Adam Sandler's previous movies), why would I bother to do this to myself?  Am I still seeking the satisfaction Sandler wrought with "The Wedding Singer", "Billy Madison" or "Happy Gilmore"?  Perhaps.  Needless to say, "Blended is crap.  Thanks to the presence of Drew Barrymore, it's not as bad as many of his other movies, but it still sucks.  That'll teach me (though probably not).


X-Men: Days of Future Past

I enjoy the "X-Men" franchise, for the most part.  I'm not super crazy about it, nor am I a big comic book fan, but it's a pretty good series.  It just tends to pack in too many characters for its own narrative good, and the underlying theme which equates the civil/gay rights movement with the plight of the mutants just doesn't work 100% for me, since neither black people nor gay people possess superpowers that have the potential to kill lots of people (at least, not that I'm aware of).  When that Senator guy from the original movie proposes a Mutant Registration bill, you know - I think I'm on his side.

That being said, "Days of Future Past" is overcrowded with characters, and I still don't buy into the metaphor.  It still manages to be one of the best movies in the series, however, and one of the best movies of May.  Also (Spoiler Alert), it successfully reboots the series, wiping out the poop-stained entries "X-Men: The Last Stand" and "X-Men Origins: Wolverine".  There are many great scenes in DOFP and, thanks to the directorial return of Bryan Singer (X1 and X2), the emotionality has also returned.  While it's also great to see Patrick Stewart and Ian McKellan reprise their roles as Professor X and Magneto, it's sadly apparent to me that their younger counterparts (James McAvoy and Michael Fassbender) have overtaken them to become the true owners of the role.  The same goes for Jennifer Lawrence as Mystique.  Rebecca Romijn who?


- The Movie of May -

Duh.  It's "Godzilla", followed closely by "Neighbors" and "X-Men: Days of Future Past".  I'm biased, but "Godzilla" contained the largest number of "perfect moments" for me, and, in my book, that's what counts.


Next time: June Edition.

Godzilla (2014) Review

or -

The Wrath of Godzilla, Part 21:  The One True Godzilla


Godzilla is my superhero.

Captain America?  Fah!  Spider-Man?  What a rube.  The X-Men?  Puh-leeze.  While the other kids were wasting their time reading comic books and dreaming of fights between moustache-twirling supervillains and dudes in tights, I was wasting my time watching Godzilla beat the snot out of any nasty giant monster who dared to intrude upon his turf.  Godzilla movies from the sixties and seventies were my bread and butter back then, and during that era Godzilla was a superhero, the protector of Earth.  Since that time, Godzilla has continued to exist and evolve and change allegiances, and with 29 starring roles under his belt, nearly a dozen tie-in movies, two television shows, numerous appearances and tie-in products, videos games and, yes, comic books, it looks like his rampage won't be stopping anytime soon.

[Beware - Massive Spoilers Ahead]

Which brings us to the new megabudget Godzilla movie from Warner Bros. and Legendary Pictures.  I've seen this movie three times (so far), and now that the opening weekend has passed, I feel it's time to review this beast.

The #1 most important aspect of the movie is this:  Did they get the character right?  The answer is a resounding YES.  Unlike the crappy 1998 "Godzilla", this one is the real deal.  The visual effects that are used to bring him to life (courtesy of Weta Digital) are top notch, and the character's performance is both surprisingly subtle and gratifyingly bad ass.  His design, while largely similar to past designs, is altered in some interesting, though not unwelcome, ways.  His original name, Gojira, is a hybrid of the Japanese words for "whale" and "gorilla", and his designers have incorporated elements of both animals into his look.  His face, though, is far more bear-like than gorilla-like.  He's also quite old and battle-scarred.  In this movie's mythology, Godzilla's origin pre-dates the prehistoric era, so he's appropriately wizened and a bit of a belligerent old fart.  He's also been hit with a couple of atomic bombs, which, as we all know, does wonders for your complexion.

Plus he has atomic breath.  Hell.  Yeah.

Before I get into the story of the movie, I have to address something first -


Godzilla: Awakening Mini-Review

Every movie these days needs a comic book prequel, why should Godzilla be any different?

The American bombing of Hiroshima has let loose a couple of ancient beasts called Shinomura (flying stingray-type creatures) who proceed to terrorize the Pacific Islands.  A mixed Japanese-American military unit named Monarch is formed to study, contain, and keep these monsters a secret from the rest of the world.  The comic's main character is the grandfather of the Dr. Serizawa character from the new movie (played by Ken Watanabe).  A survivor of Hiroshima, elder Serizawa is recruited into Monarch early on and becomes obsessed with a third monster, a creature which the Islanders call Gojira, whom they worship as a monstrous god of the sea.  Gojira (Godzilla) appears to be hunting the Shinomura.

The mythology for the monsters is pretty cool in this iteration.  Millions of years before the dinosaurs existed, the world was a hotbed of radiation and was apparently populated by animals who thrived in radioactive environments.  These beasties, referred to as "kingdom problematica" or MUTOs (Massive Unidentified Terrestrial Organisms), mostly died off when the Earth's radioactivity subsided, but some adapted themselves to live deep underground or under the sea, where radioactivity from the Earth's core was more abundant.  Some, like the Shinomura, merely went into hibernation on the Earth's surface.  Now, with humanity entering the Atomic Age and bringing radiation back into style, it appears that the MUTO threat has returned.

Godzilla kills one of the Shinomura.  The American government, intimidated by Godzilla, decides to hit him with an atomic bomb in order to curb any threat he might pose.  Serizawa disagrees - he believes that Godzilla represents the "balance of nature" or something (I'm not so sure if that's the case, but okay) and believes that he should be left alone.  Naturally, Serizawa is ignored.  The government bombs both the G-Man and the Shinomura at Bikini Atoll.  Obviously, Godzilla survives.  He will not appear again until 60 years later - but until then Monarch will be keeping watch.

"Awakening" is a handsome, well-drawn prequel.  It nicely fills out the story of Monarch and Godzilla's first appearance, all of which is conveyed in the movie in a rather cursory, but clear, fashion, and helps to provide a little more weight to the big screen character of Dr. Serizawa.  It's well worth your time.

Now back to the movie -

Miners in the Philippines unleash a couple of MUTOs when they accidentally fall into a massive underground cavern.  After one of the MUTOs sucks up radiation from a nuclear power plant in Japan (and causing a massive disaster in the process), the Monarch organization is unceremoniously re-integrated into the U.S. military, who continues to track the two MUTOs as well as a third creature (Godzilla, of course), all of whom are converging on the city of San Francisco.  The MUTOs intend to spawn, threatening all life on Earth as we know it.  Godzilla arrives, kills them both in spectacular fashion, and swims into the sea, victorious.

Very simple.  Very satisfying.

There are also humans in this movie, as you may have heard.  The biggest criticisms of "Godzilla" tend to revolve around the human characters and their generous amount of screen time.  I, too, was initially taken aback by how much running time the human beings gobble up.  Heck, even the MUTO's get more screen time than Godzilla.  In the end, and especially after three viewings, it's really not a big deal.  The characters are kind of one-dimensional and a little bit bland, and they don't have very complex character arcs, but they're more than enough - for now.  I, too, wish the movie had succeeded in its ambition and become not just a great monster movie, but a great drama, something that transcends the genre.  That doesn't happen here, but after sitting through 40-plus Godzilla-verse movies and the many one-dimensional characters therein, the characters in this movie aren't bad at all.  Don't even mention the annoying caricatures that were passed off as characters in the '98 version.

Maybe it's the potential.  There's so much potential here, especially with the characters, and this film is a great baseline establishing point.  The actors are certainly talented enough, so why not?  Juliette Binoche and Bryan Cranston don't last very long in the movie, but it's great to see them.  Cranston at least gets a couple of great scenes early on (one of which includes a nice Mothra reference).  Aaron Taylor-Johnson plays the white bread, stoic soldier main character.  He's getting a lot of flak from critics for being too flat, but I totally believe him as a professional, no-nonsense military man, even if he's not very dynamic.  On subsequent viewings, I've grown to quite enjoy his relationship with Godzilla - there seems to be a strange Zen attachment between him and the monster which I find to be a fascinating story detail.  He lost both of his parents to the MUTOs, and it's suggested that Godzilla may have lost someone to them too - in the cave in the Philippines, there are the remains of a Godzilla-like creature with the MUTO eggs, suggesting (to me, at least) that it may possibly have been a relative/mate/old College buddy.  While Brody (Taylor-Johnson) fights to save his family from the MUTOs, Godzilla may be, too.  Kindred souls, noble warriors.  Samurai brothers from another mother.

Elizabeth Olsen, who is a fantastic actress (she's great at playing crazy, can't wait to see her in "Avengers 2"), is wasted here as the concerned-wife-in-danger.  She's the motivation for Taylor-Johnson's character, nothing more.  Ken Watanabe is the new Dr. Serizawa (a character from the original 1954 "Gojira"), and he's the requisite foreboding scientist character.  It's too bad he disappears during the climax, but at least he gets to utter the movie's most memorable one-liner ("Let them fight.").  Finally, there's David Strathairn as the "head military guy".  He's alright.

Like I said earlier, there's so much potential here.  At the end of the movie, the world knows that ancient, giant monsters exist and that Godzilla is the King of the Monsters and a protector of sorts (even though he kills lots of people along the way).  It would be great to see Monarch get reinstated and awarded generous government backing.  Put Strathairn in charge, make Serizawa (and his assistant played by Sally Hawkins) the brains of the operation, and recruit Olsen's character, give her something meaningful to do (they'll need medical personnel).  Then make Brody the point man.  Continue to explore his Zen connection with Godzilla.  Heck, have them build a new Mechagodzilla and have Brody pilot it, then he can fight side-by-side with Godzilla.  That would be sweet! 

Okay, I'm getting too overexcited now.

Gareth Edwards, overall, did a fantastic job directing this film.  There are some sequences in particular, usually involving the monsters, where he knocks it completely out of the park.  He does go a little overboard with "the teasing of the monsters and then not paying it off right away" aspects of the movie, but I prefer this to the 20 minute-long repetitive CG bore-fest action sequences that are staples of "Transformers" movies or in "Man of Steel".  The action scenes that Edwards devises are short but hit the sweet spot perfectly.  They leave you wanting more.  They don't drain your energy (or patience).

The MUTOs themselves are completely original to this movie.  Actually, "original" may not be the right word.  They're very reminiscent of other multi-limbed modern American monsters like the ones in "Cloverfield" or "Super 8".  There are a couple of differences - one of the MUTOs can fly, and both of them can emit technology-killing EMP pulses.  Perhaps when Godzilla is destroying them, he's really destroying the image of the American Movie Monster.  Now that this new movie is a box-office success, it's highly likely that Toho will grant the filmmakers the rights to one or more of the other classic monsters.  I vote for Gigan.  Or King Ghidorah.

Plus, it's a shame that the new monsters are merely referred to as MUTOs.  The ones in the comic at least had a name - Shinomura.

Edwards also shoots much of the movie from the perspective of us lowly humans.  I first noticed this style of monster movie filmmaking in Shusuke Kaneko's mid-'90s "Gamera" trilogy.  Some feel that it detracts from the monster action, but I quite like it - as long as it isn't overused.  Edwards sometimes comes close.  After Godzilla makes his first full-on appearance in the movie, it cuts away to a television screen, where his subsequent (brief) battle with a MUTO is shown.  When I first saw this, it disappointed me.  When I saw it again, I realized that it was meant to be funny - and it is!  It's actually one of the few laughs in the movie.  My own expectations tripped me up.

The visual effects are awesome (Andy Serkis was a performance consultant for Godzilla).  The sound effects are fantastic (I love Godzilla's tweaked signature roar).  The characters (and the overall story) show a lot of potential.  The tone of the movie is excellent - it's not as bleak or scary as the trailers make it out to be.  They kept the fantasy aspect of Godzilla, and I love that - I hate when they try to ground fantasy to the point where it becomes uninteresting.  I've been listening to the score by Alexandre Desplat non-stop, and it's both surprisingly subtle and rousingly heroic at the same time.  I love the Japanese instruments in the score, and the fact that Godzilla's atomic breath has its own musical accompaniment.

This is one of those movies where the flaws in the film wash away more each time I see it, unlike the '98 remake, where the flaws get glaringly more aggravating with each and every viewing.  That's because the new movie's high points are truly fantastic and pitch perfect - the '98 movie no longer exists in this dojo.  There are more "perfect moments" here than in any other film I've seen so far this year, despite its shortcomings.  It's lucky if a film has even one "perfect moment", and this has multiple.  It will doubtlessly end up as one of my favorites of the year.

Welcome back, Godzilla!

The Wrath of Godzilla, Part 20: End of Days

Godzilla:  Tokyo S.O.S. (2003)

"Godzilla X Mothra X Mechagodzilla:  Tokyo S.O.S." is the original Japanese title for this, the 27th Godzilla film from Toho Studios.  This is also the first direct sequel in the Millenium series; it's predecessor is 2002's "Godzilla Against Mechagodzilla", a movie which I really dug.

As Mechagodzilla, also known as "Kiryu", is getting repaired from its last battle against Godzilla (and getting its Absolute Zero freezing weapon replaced with a new Tri-Maser cannon), the Shobijin (Twin Beauties) arrive to warn Japan that the Big G will continue to attack them unless they give the original Godzilla's bones (the basis of Kiryu's structure) a proper burial at sea.  Japanese officials say "heck nope", prompting the Shobijin to threaten bringing down Mothra on their asses if they don't comply immediately.  Godzilla suddenly arrives on the scene to crush things prompting both Kiryu and Mothra to rush in as defenders.  The monster proves to be too much to handle - Kiryu is damaged and Mothra is killed.

Back on Mothra Island, two larval Mothra emerge from a giant egg and head off to the mainland to take on the big lizard.  In a pitched battle (and with aid from the Japanese military), the larvae encase Godzilla in a cocoon of silk.  Kiryu's chief engineer Yoshito Chujo, who's extremely desperate to repair Mechagodzilla in order to defend his endangered relatives in the city, awakens the soul of the original Godzilla through his highly emotional pleading and kicking of electronic equipment (that never works for me).  Kiryu "comes to life" on its own, grabs Godzilla, jumps into the sea and pins him to the ocean floor for all eternity.

This is the third Godzilla film from Masaaki Tezuka and his team, and it's just as good as his other entries.  This one has a slightly different structure, however.  The first half of the movie is largely actionless and mostly character and story-driven.  The back half is one long action scene sprinkled with some breathing moments for good measure.  It's a formula which works well in this case.  Anticipation tends to work far better than non-stop instant gratification.

Speaking of characters, I suppose I should discuss them a little bit more in detail.  The human characters in these movies have always been second fiddle to the titanic forces around them, used mostly as reference points for the audience's point of view, but I rather enjoy the characters in Tezuka's movies more than in the usual Godzilla flick.  The main character this time around is not a kick-ass female, as in the previous two, but is Kiryu's brilliant young engineer Chujo, played well by Noboru Kaneko.  His character is the grandson of Shinichi Chujo, the main character from 1961's "Mothra".  Hiroshi Koizumi reprises his role as the elder Chujo and is a full-on supporting player in the story.  Being a direct sequel to the original "Mothra" adds a layer of nostalgic warmth that the previous movie lacked (and was all the more colder for it).

A couple of other characters from "Godzilla Against Mechagodzilla" also reprise their roles in "Tokyo S.O.S.".  Most notable among these is the return of the main character Akane, who passes the torch to engineer Chujo in a very sweet-natured scene set in Kiryu's engineering bay.  To make up for the lack of butt-kicking female warriors, there's the character of Kisaragi, a lady pilot who doesn't have much screen time but gets a "save the day" moment in the action-packed climax.

Two interesting things of note:  Tezuka's fondness for mid and end-credit bonus scenes is still present in "S.O.S".  One of these particular scenes, set in an unknown lab location, indicates that DNA from Godzilla and various other monsters from past Godzilla flicks is being used to create clones for some shady, obscure purpose.  This is never followed up on, however.  Also, the body of a Kamoebas (giant rock turtle) washes up on shore early on in "S.O.S.".  Kamoebas was a monster previously seen in 1971's "Space Amoeba".

Overall, it's an entertaining film.  The presence of Mothra and Mechagodzilla is a little, shall we say, time-worn at this point (new monsters, please), but the movie's infusion of both nostalgic resonance and themes of spiritual bonding between souls adds a bit more dimension to "Tokyo S.O.S." than the previous installment, even though is the action isn't quite as good.

Godzilla:  Final Wars (2004)

This movie is freakin' insane.  And I love it.

Godzilla's fiftieth birthday had arrived, and producer Shogo Tomiyama wanted to throw the biggest monster party of all time.  With a large budget at his disposal (the largest for any Japanese Godzilla film), Tomiyama set out to produce a sort of "Greatest Hits" compilation for his monstrous star.  Hired to direct was Ryuhei Kitamura, the young dynamo director of such cult flicks as "Versus", "Azumi" and "The Midnight Meat Train".  His adrenaline-charged style, combined with his love for 1970's-era Godzilla films, would result in a movie so whacked-out and unfettered that it would split the Godzilla fan community right down the middle.  But you gotta admit, it's a helluva party flick!

Here's the plot:  In the late 60's, Godzilla was buried beneath the ice of Antarctica while doing battle with the flying battleship called Gotengo (from the 1963 movie "Atragon").  Since that time, other monsters have continued to hassle the human race, but a new super-powered race of human beings began to emerge - mutants.  The Earth Defense Force (EDF) recruited some of these mutants to form the M-Organization, a task force dedicated to taking out giant rampaging monsters with surgical accuracy.

When a dozen giant monsters begin crushing cities all over the world simultaneously, salvation arrives in the form of the Xiliens, humanoid aliens who stop the monsters and promise World Peace in exchange for an alliance with the human race.  This, of course, is bullshit, and when their plans are exposed for all the world to see, the Xiliens show their true colors.  It turns out that members of their race interbred with humans thousands of years ago, leading to the birth of the mutant sub-race, a sub-race which the Xiliens can control telepathically.  After gaining a private army by taking over the minds of all mutantkind, the alien jerks send release all of the monsters they've captured and force humanity to become nothing more than slaves.

There is resistance.  A ragtag group of uncontrolled mutants and humans steal the Gotengo in order to enact the ultimate Hail Mary plan - to free Godzilla from the ice and kick some alien butt.  Which they do.  Godzilla plows his way through all enemy monsters, the crew of the Gotengo take out the aliens and their mother ship, and Godzilla swims off into the sunset, victorious.

Gone are the serious, heavy themes of previous installments, gone is the lumbering dread - "Final Wars" is all about turbocharged monster-on-monster action coupled with Anime-styled comic book shenanigans.  It's a nice change of pace, honestly.

Monster Roll Call!!!

There's Godzilla (of course), Minilla, Mothra, Gigan (finally!), Hedorah the Smog Monster, Ebirah the Big-Ass Lobster, Manda the Serpent, Zilla (the American Godzilla), Kamacuras the Mantis, Anguirus, Rodan, King Caesar, Kumonga the Spider, and the mysterious Monster X who, at the climactic confrontation, transforms into (who else?) King Ghidorah.  Many other monsters show up in the opening montage.  The only monsters missing from the lineup are King Kong, Gorosaurus and Mechagodzilla (those last two were meant to appear in the film, but didn't make it for budgetary reasons).  This ensures a non-stop final hour of beast-on-beast carnage.  There are many highlights among the parade of battles, but one of my favorites is the long-awaited fight between the Japanese man-in-suit Godzilla and the American CG'ed Zilla.  The battle only lasts about a minute.

There sure is a long period of time before the monster melee begins, however, so Kitamura fills it with as much human-based shenanigans as possible.  Most of it is ripped off from "The Matrix", which was in vogue at the time, but it's still fun to watch.  There is some monster mayhem to be had, though.  One particular sequence featuring a team of mutants bringing down Ebirah is particularly cool, as is a montage of all of the monsters rampaging throughout cities all across the world.

Rodan goes to New York City and kills a pimp.

The human cast is peppered with familiar actors from across the entire Godzilla series.  The main actors are all fresh faces, however.  The lead character, played by Shinichi Ozaki, is a capable actor and action hero, even if his character isn't all that original.  The main villain (Kazuki Kitamura) is your classic moustache-twirling eeeevildoer, but is fun to watch, in a campy sort of way.  There's an American face in the cast, as well - mixed martial arts fighter Don "The Predator" Frye as Gordon, Captain of the Gotengo.  He's a terrible actor, but is oddly likable and has a distinctive look.  Sadly, the women are mostly relegated to forgettable supporting characters this time.  Alas.

It's a crazy fun movie with a lot of heart, and it's never boring.  I enjoyed Kitamura's rock-n'-roll style and campy, 1970's-Godzilla-inspired milieu, which has earned this particular Godzilla movie a cult following of its very own.  When it was originally released in Japan, however, reviews were highly mixed and it became a box office disappointment.  Unfortunate.  I think it's a nice finale for the Millennium series.

For the past ten years, Godzilla has remained fairly dormant.  His only onscreen appearance was in a dream sequence in the Japanese comedy "Always 2" (2008).  It's pretty cool.

The CGI isn't the greatest, but it's neat to see any Godzilla product coming out of Japan.  His design (particularly the blank white eyes) recalls his design in "GMK".  Freaky.

In the summer of 2013, Guillermo Del Toro's "Pacific Rim" was released in theaters.  While not part of the Godzilla series, it nonetheless owed much to the Japanese icon.  Though the story and characters were quite rote and clichéd, the effects and action sequences were fantastically well done and there are some cool ideas sprinkled here and there in the story.  Here's a cool trailer for the movie, done in the style of an old school Toho Studios classic.  It's a perfect fit!

Well, that's it for now!  If only someone would make a new Godzilla film. . .

The Wrath of Godzilla, Part 19: Immortal Souls

Godzilla, Mothra and King Ghidorah:  Giant Monsters All-Out Attack (2001)

Sheesh, what a title.  Just call it "GMK" - that's what all the cool kids (a.k.a. Godzilla Fans) call it.

In the mid-1990s, director Shusuke Kaneko gave us the fantastic and financially successful Gamera trilogy.  While doing promotional interviews for the press, Kaneko mentioned more than once how it had always been his lifelong dream to direct a Godzilla movie.  It wasn't long before Toho gave him a chance to fulfill that dream, and "GMK" was born.

Co-written and directed by Kaneko, "GMK", like most Millennium Series entries, is primarily a standalone film.  The only other Godzilla  movies it acknowledges are the 1954 original and the 1998 American remake, which it references only so it can be ridiculed.  In this story, Godzilla is the living embodiment of all of the people killed by the Japanese during World War II.  While he also represents the destructive folly of man, this spiritual conception of the Big G (and the other creatures, too) is something unique to "GMK".  It's a welcome, nightmarish take on the character, and it's reflected in the creature's design aesthetic as well.  He's once again a giant, gray behemoth, much like the Heisei incarnation, but his eyes are completely white and lifeless.  Damn, it's creepy.

The story is simple.  Godzilla returns to punish the people of Japan.  In response, three ancient guardian monsters, the Holy Beasts of Yamato (Mothra, King Ghidorah, and Baragon), return to protect the Earth via the kicking of some giant ghost lizard ass.  On the human side of things, the story focuses on a father/daughter duo:  Ryudo Uzaki plays the dad, an experienced military man with a heart of Zen, whose parents were killed by Godzilla's first rampage in '54.  He's awesome.  His daughter, played Chiharu Niiyama, is an ambitious reporter for a hack paranormal investigation program.  She's primarily the conveyor of the plot information, but gets caught up in some of the action, too.  She's pretty good.

After plowing his way through all of the guardian monsters (this Godzilla is a real beast), Military Zen Dad pilots a submersible down Godzilla's throat and detonates a specially designed drill bomb within the creature, piercing its hide.  He escapes from the monsters body just as Godzilla tries to use his atomic breath, which somehow short circuits due to the open wound, causing the monster to explode.  In a final shot ripped right from the "Friday the 13th" playbook, Godzilla's heart is shown lying on the ocean floor - and it's still beating.

This is a good one.  It's got an old school Godzilla movie feel to it, which is retro-cool.  The spiritual aspects of the plot adds freshness and emotional weight to the proceedings.  It's fun to see Baragon from "Frankenstein Conquers the World" (apparently Kaneko's original idea was to pit Godzilla against B-list monsters Baragon, Varan and Angilus, but Toho made him add more big-name beasties), but it's too bad the little purple dog wasn't famous enough to get his name listed in the title.  Plus, King Ghidorah as a good guy?  Weird, but not unwelcome.

Kaneko felt a bit disappointed with how the movie turned out, due to the massive production rush to get it into theaters, but he may be the only one.  While some of those production woes did indeed show up onscreen, "GMK" still managed to be the biggest box office hit of the Millennium Series, and is considered by many to be the best.  Its old school charm, emotionally charged plot, and non-stop monster mayhem made this one a real winner with daikaiju fans worldwide.  It's not my favorite Millennium installment, though.  I will discuss that one in Part 20.

Godzilla Against Mechagodzilla (2002)

Technically, the title of the movie is "Godzilla X Mechagodzilla", but the Japanese are so much better at math than Americans, so all mathematical symbols were removed for the Stateside release.

Masaaki Tezuka, director of "Godzilla Vs. Megaguirus", was brought back to craft the latest chapter in the Millennium Series, and he brought his entire creative team with him.  This means that the emotionally heavy themes of the previous Godzilla movie have been jettisoned in favor of techno-action and a Hollywood-style roller coaster of frothy emotion.  This is not a bad thing, just different.  I happen to enjoy this particular entry quite a bit.

As explained by a handy opening montage, there are only four previous Toho movies which exist in this movie's timeline:  "Gojira"(1954), "Mothra"(1961), "War of the Gargantuas" (1966), and "Space Amoeba"(1971).  Talented young soldier Akane, played wonderfully by Yumiko Shaku, is responsible for accidentally causing the deaths of fellow soldiers during an anti-Godzilla Op - an Op involving MASERs, mind you (that's Mobile Lasers, for the uninitiated).  Following that failure, the government turns to a team of brilliant scientists to bring to life a very wacky idea.  Get this:  After recovering the skeleton of the original Godzilla from 1954, they decide that it's a good idea to build a robotic exoskeleton around it and fuse it all together using a DNA-based operating system.  The result:  Mechagodzilla, whom the team dubs "Kiryu", a new pilotable anti-Godzilla super weapon.

Akane, damaged both emotionally and career-wise, still has her supporters, and it's not long before they offer her the opportunity to pilot Kiryu and redeem her honor.  The other pilots object to her presence, and things are further complicated when, during Kiryu's first confrontation with Godzilla, the Big G's roar activates Kiryu's skeleton DNA.  Kiryu then goes on a rampage reminiscent of the original 1954 Godzilla until its power runs down.

Akane, through the connections she makes with the people in her life, slowly begins to heal, but it's through her emerging bond with Kiryu that true daikaiju healing begins to take hold.  She pilots Kiryu into battle with Godzilla one last time and manages to wound him with Kiryu's Absolute Zero freezing weapon, causing the monster to retreat.  And all is well.

"GXM" has the same feel as Tezuka's previous movie, "Megaguirus".  He sure loves tough female main characters.  I know I do.  Heck, the main actress from "Megaguirus" even comes back, in a bit role as a different character.  I like that his movies aren't morality plays, just simple emotional stories featuring noble soldiers in giant robots fighting giant monsters.  The action is explosive, the special effects are well done, the characters are distinct and fun, the music is great, and the pacing is peppy and tight.  It's a fun, pulpy ride.  Plus, this is the only film in the Millennium Series to have a direct sequel - the following year's "Godzilla: Tokyo S.O.S."

A Tip:  Be sure to watch through the credits.  There are some great scenes to be had.  Well, one great scene.  It's worth it.

Only two more movies to go in the Millennium series.  And after that. . .

The Wrath of Godzilla, Part 18: Exodus

Godzilla 2000 (1999)


Most everyone hated the 1998 American remake of "Godzilla", especially the Japanese, so it wasn't long before the Big G returned to his homeland to start anew.  Released in Japan in December of 1999, "Godzilla 2000 Millennium" (as it was originally known) became a box office hit.  Not to be outdone, TriStar pictures, who produced and released the American remake and owned the Stateside rights to the Japanese entries, lopped "Millennium" from the title, re-edited it, re-scored it, re-recorded the dialogue with English-speaking actors, and released it in American movie theaters during the summer of 2000.  It bombed at the box office and was the last modern Godzilla movie to be released theatrically in America until 2014 (not counting the limited theatrical release of the original Japanese "Gojira" in 2004).

"Godzilla 2000" ignores the events of all previous films in the series.  In this story, Godzilla has been present for a long time.  He makes landfall now and again to snack on a nuclear power plant or two, and it's the job of the CCI (Crisis Control Institute) to ward him off.  Keeping an eye on his movements is the Godzilla Prediction Network, an amateur network of diligent citizens led by the father/daughter team of Yuji and Io Shinoda.  Their back story is never explained, but I suspect that the duo's determination to track Godzilla may have something to do with the absent mother figure.

The CCI discovers a meteorite at the bottom of the ocean floor and decides to raise it up.  As soon as it hits sunlight, it flies off to confront Godzilla.  Before you consider that the movie should have been called "Godzilla Vs. a Rock", it sheds its stone casing and reveals itself to be an alien spacecraft.  Meanwhile, Yuji discovers the secret to Godzilla's strength and healing ability, a cell they dub "Regenerator G1" ("Organizer G1" in the Japanese version).  The alien ship, after surfing the Internet for a while, learns of this discovery and sucks "Regenerator" straight from Godzilla's DNA.  The alien inside uses it to adapt to Earth's atmosphere and becomes a creature called Orga, who takes on Godzilla in a one-on-one fight for dominance.  Big mistake.  Orga opens up its mouth to swallow Godzilla whole, so Godzilla sticks his head right in and blows the critter up from the inside with his atomic breath (bad ass moment #1).  Then he confronts the head of the CCI (who's a real asshole), kills him face-to-face (bad ass moment #2) and stomps off victorious.

Directed by Godzilla veteran Takao Owara ("Godzilla and Mothra: The Battle for Earth", "Godzilla Vs. Mechagodzilla II", "Godzilla Vs. Destoroyah"), "Godzilla 2000" represented a return to form for the series.  It was far from perfect, though.  The movie feels a bit piecemeal and uneven, due in no small part to its rushed production.  The digital effects artists were still going composite-crazy (as in the "Rebirth of Mothra" trilogy), resulting in many terrible visual effects (and a couple of great ones, too - one shot with a jeep in the foreground racing against Godzilla in the background is pretty cool).  The re-cut, dubbed American version is, surprisingly, the superior version of the movie.  While the English dubbing is ungodly in its cheesiness, it's still funnier and less annoying than the dialogue in the 1998 American remake.

Toho Studios even thought the American cut was better, so it became the default version of the film after it was released.  The editing was tighter, the music was better, and the movie felt more like a fast-paced ride than the slogging Japanese cut.  I'm not a big fan of the Millennium Series Japanese redesign of Godzilla.  His mouth and his spines are too freakishly big and he has too much of an unwieldy, Anime-inspired look to him (trivia note - he's the first green-colored Godzilla in the history of the series), but it's nothing I can't live with.  It was just great to see the real Godzilla on the big screen again.

Godzilla Vs. Megaguirus (2000)

Many fans consider this to be the worst movie in the Millennium Series (excepting the American remake).  I disagree.  I consider "Godzilla 2000" to be the worst (well, least best) entry.  I will detail my arguments below.  First, though, lets get to the basics.

"Godzilla X Megaguirus: G Extermination Command" is its Japanese title.  It was released in the year 2000 and was the lowest-grossing movie in the Millennium Series.  Newcomer Masaaki Tezuka took over the directorial reigns this time around and was working from a script by Hiroshi Kashiwabara and Wataru Mimura, who also wrote "Godzilla 2000".  TriStar Pictures had originally wanted to release this movie theatrically in the United States, but the box office failure of "Godzilla 2000" nixed that idea.

Like most of the other movies in Series 3, "Godzilla Vs. Megaguirus" pretends that all of the other movies don't exist.  The Plot:  Since Godzilla's first appearance in 1954, nuclear power has been abandoned in order to deter Godzilla's advances.  Humanity has turned to plasma-based energy to meet its needs.  In order to defeat Godzilla once and for all, Japanese scientists have developed a plasma-based satellite weapon which can create mini black holes to suck up all matter and energy within a predetermined area.  They call it the Dimension Tide.  During its preliminary test, a wormhole is formed.  A prehistoric dragonfly emerges from the wormhole, lays an egg, and returns to its original time period.  The egg gets into the sewer system of a nearby city where is splits into hundreds of eggs, causing the city to flood.

The eggs hatch into large dragonflies called Meganulas.  The Meganulas zero in on the biggest nearby power source, Godzilla, drain his energy, then transfer that energy to the Alpha Grub, also known as the Meganulon.  The Meganulon transforms into the super-powered dragonfly Megaguirus and battles Godzilla to defend its territory.  Meanwhile, a joint effort by the scientific team behind Dimension Tide (led by a young rebel hipster scientist named Kudo) and an anti-Godzilla task force, the G-Graspers (led by kick-ass female warrior Kiriko Tsujimori) conspire to get the satellite weapon up and working.  Godzilla kills Megaguirus (after one particularly bad ass moment where he bites off the giant insect's stinger), and turns his rage towards the city.  It seems that one of the Japanese politicians has been secretly experimenting with a nuclear power source beneath the city, putting everyone at risk.  Tsujimori puts her own life in danger to target Dimension Tide's final shot before its satellite burns up in the atmosphere.  Dimension Tide hits Godzilla, sucking him into a black hole.  Yay.  That doesn't appear to be enough, however.  During a couple of mid-to-end credits scenes, Godzilla returns.  It's not explained, but I'm guessing that he came back through a wormhole after a short vacation in prehistory.

I think this is a solid entry in the series.  Whether it's because of director Tezuka or not, I'm not sure, but it's a much more solid movie than "2000".  It's well-paced, the visual effects are much better, the music by Michiru Oshima is quite excellent (themes which originate in this film return in future installments), the cheesy comic relief is still present but there's much less of it, the characters are more well-formed and are less "arch", and the action sequences are more varied and original (like one scene where Tsujimori rides atop Godzilla's back).  Speaking of Kiriko Tsujimori, she's the first true female butt-kicker in the series (it's about time).  Godzilla's other opponent, Megaguirus, is a new take on an insect character which first appeared in "Rodan"(1956).  He's kind of a mash-up between Mothra and a Godzilla-copying creature like Orga, but he's got a bit of a sadistic personality and makes a great villain.

Overall, I find it to be a quite enjoyable film.  The idea of using a black hole to defeat Godzilla is a unique idea, but there are also many themes and characters that feel like rehashes of similar tropes from the series' past.  This may be why many critics consider this to be a lesser film. Whether or not these tropes are welcome is a matter of personal taste.  Tropes ain't all bad, if they're done well.

Coming up next, the final four films of the Millennium Series.  Here's where the Series gets really good. . .

The Wrath of Godzilla, Part 17: False Idol

The American Godzilla movie was released in May of 1998, marking the beginning of the Millennium Series, also known as Series 3 ("Rebirth of Mothra 3" was also released in '98, but is still considered to be a Series 2 entry).  The major distinction that sets Series 3 apart from the others is that it's not one long narrative - each movie in Series 3 (with one exception) is a standalone story.  Well, to be more accurate, most of these movies are a direct sequel to the original 1954 "Gojira" and pretends that all of the other movies don't exist.  This allows for new potential audience members to jump right into these movies without having to worry about not knowing any back story (beyond the original, which they often recap anyway).  It's an interesting approach.  Me, I've always preferred ongoing storylines.  I consider Series 3 to be the weakest of three.  It began in 1998 and lasted through 2004.


Godzilla (1998)

Imagine if a movie studio remade "Star Wars" (the original, "Episode IV: A New Hope").  What if that studio decided to remove the concept of "The Force" and replace it by having characters tap into a magical computer energy field with personal tablet devices in order to achieve the same powers.  Lightsabers would similarly be replaced by goggles which would shoot laser beams.  The character of Luke Skywalker would no longer be a teenage farm boy with big dreams, he would be a successful middle-aged banker going through a messy divorce.  Then the filmmakers decide to make Darth Vader a super intelligent toddler who rides around in a floating baby stroller, throwing hard candy at those who displease him.  The setting?  It no longer takes place in outer space - now it takes place during Woodstock.  The plot?  It's no longer about a noble rebel alliance and their struggles against a vast and oppressive evil empire, now it's a story about a dispute over the taxation of trade routes.  In short, it's not "Star Wars".

That's how we felt about the 1998 American "Godzilla" - it's not Godzilla.  When I say "we", I mean all those who've seen a true Godzilla movie.  To the majority of American moviegoers, Godzilla was just a giant rampaging lizard who was woken up by an atomic bomb blast. 

Wrong. 

There have been dozens and dozens of movies made over the past century featuring enormous radioactive reptiles, and they are not Godzilla.  So, what makes Godzilla who he/she/it is?  Let me try to explain this another way - I will now recount the ways in which the 1998 Godzilla is not Godzilla:

1) Godzilla is a force of nature.  He is not a giant iguana.  He is not an animal at all, really - he's the personification of our arrogance and recklessness turned against us (or, in some cases, fighting for us).  I like to think of him as 75% natural disaster and 25% Frankenstein's monster.  There is a sympathetic side to him, but that sympathy occurs not because he's a dumb animal who destroys things because he doesn't know any better, but because he's a misguided child of the human race who knows exactly what he's doing, he just doesn't care.  There is no place for him on this Earth, yet the Earth is the only place he can call home.  Godzilla is a bit of a paradox, an unwanted child who never should have been, but exists, for better or worse.  You root for him because, well, humans deserve a little comeuppance for what we've done to the planet and ourselves, but at the same time you fear him and want him to go away.  He's an enigma wrapped in a mystery wrapped in a big frickin' lizard.

2) Godzilla has atomic breath.  The 1998 Godzilla has nothing.  The element of Fantasy is an important part of the Godzilla mythos.  Much like what happens with "Tarzan" adaptations, the Americanized version wrongheadedly tried to take a realistic National Geographic approach to the character.  Thus, no atomic breath.  People who've seen 1998's "Godzilla" swear that he breathes fire in the movie, but it's not true.  There are two scenes in the movie where the monster roars and its breath sends the flames from nearby explosions billowing forth, making it appear almost like fire breath, but it's merely meant to be an homage to the original character.  Lame.

3) "Godzilla does not run from helicopters."  That's an exact quote given by a Toho Studios executive immediately after seeing the American version for the first time, and it's very true.  When Godzilla is attacked, he moves toward his attackers.  I like the idea of a fast moving Godzilla, but it takes away from the "walking natural disaster" portion of his character if he's always retreating and avoiding danger.  If he'd had his atomic breath, he could still have unleashed the requisite amount of mass destruction, but, alas. . .

4) Godzilla cannot be killed by four dinky missiles fired from fighter jets.  Come on, people.

5) Godzilla movies do not end with terrible Puff Daddy songs.  The Wallflowers song was okay, though.

6) Godzilla movies do not grind to a halt with a bland, overlong sequence involving raptors/baby Godzillas chasing our heroes through Madison Square Garden.  If I wanted to watch "Jurassic Park", I would watch "Jurassic Park".  Actually, this sequence would have been cut out of a "Jurassic Park" movie. 

What does this movie get right?  A couple of the action sequences are okay.  It's got the right character spread - the main human characters in Godzilla movies usually consist of a combination of certain archetypes, namely a scientist, a reporter and a military person.  The 1998 movie has those characters, except that here they are all incredibly grating and annoying and unwatchable.  I like a few of the actors involved here (Matthew Broderick, Jean Reno), but they're all terribly played and screechingly unfunny when they're supposed to be endearingly amusing.  In this case, cheesy voice dubbing would have improved the movie.

What about the plot?  It's very simple.  Atomic bomb testing in French Polynesia creates a giant mutant hybrid lizard.  Said mutant hybrid lizard eats a lot of fish and heads for New York City in order to make a nest - see, it reproduces asexually and is currently pregnant.  After blowing up Madison Square Garden and killing off the babies, a couple of fighter jets kill the big lizard.  The End.  The human characters have stories too, but they take up far too much screen time and make me sad.  But, hey, at least the advertising campaign was cool!

Toho blindly trusted filmmakers Roland Emmerich and Dean Devlin to bring their beloved character to the shores of America.  After the success of their previous film "Independence Day", Toho handed over the rights to a U.S. remake with the confidence that they had made the right decision.  Instead they ended up with a movie that barely resembled its source material, was filled with wrongheaded emotional beats, and had absolutely no themes or subtext whatsoever.  Everyone was disappointed and the movie underperformed at the box office.  In Toho's official monster lineup, the American Godzilla is known as Zilla.  Fans have taken to calling him GINO (Godzilla In Name Only).  There would be no sequel.

Well, that's not entirely true. . .



Godzilla: The Series (1998-2000)

The 1998 movie ends with a baby Godzilla hatching from an egg which has miraculously survived the destruction of Madison Square Garden.  That baby would grow up (quickly) and star in 40 episodes of a follow-up animated series that aired on FOX.

I disliked the source movie, so I never bothered to check out this series - until now.  Color me surprised, because I enjoyed it far more than I thought I would.  Picking up exactly where the movie ends (even recreating the climactic action sequence in animated form), Matthew Broderick's character of Niko Tatopoulos (now voiced by Ian Ziering of "Sharknado") discovers the young Godzilla, who imprints on him and becomes much more human-friendly than it's predecessor.  Soon after, more mutant critters begin to appear, so Tatopoulos and his newly-formed crew of specialists (and Godzilla, of course) must deal the monstrous threats and save the Earth.

It's a Saturday morning-style cartoon, so you know what to expect, but it's well done for what it is.  The actors do a better job playing the animated characters than the live action actors did (a couple of the actors from the movie reprise their roles in the show), a lot of the jokes are actually funny, and the plots are reasonably enjoyable.  In short - it's better than the movie.  It's also better than the Hanna-Barbera cartoon from the late '70s-early '80s.

The animated Godzilla is even a step closer to being the real Godzilla: He has fire breath (not atomic, though), he's much tougher to kill, he's larger, he fights other monsters, and he even has a bit of an attitude.  He's still not quite Godzilla, but the producers were heading in the right direction.  None of the monster foes in the show ever became official Toho monsters (although a couple of them resemble famous Toho creations), but they were varied and interesting enough to drive the stories forward and entertain.

The series ended in 2000.  Zilla would only make one more appearance, in " Godzilla: Final Wars" (2004).

Godzilla returned to Japan for the rest of the Millenium Series.  But he made one more theatrical appearance in the States. . .

Captain America: The Winter Soldier Review

In accordance with tradition, I will now continue from where I left off in my review of "Thor: The Dark World" by briefly touching upon all of the Marvel Cinematic Universe stuff that's been unveiled since then.  After that, the "Cap" review.


Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D.

It just keeps getting better and better.  The long, seemingly random gaps between the airings of the episodes really annoys me (damn you, ABC), but the show is keeping me interested.  It's not on a "Breaking Bad" level of good, it's more on the same level of something like "Fringe", but the central mystery is intriguing, the characters are reasonably engaging, and the way it ties into and expands the MCU is still neat.  The action is still a bit lacking, and the show sometimes comes across as gimmicky, but I still enjoy it.  After the events of "The Winter Soldier", however, the show should get really, really interesting (there are, I believe, six episodes left in this season).

Marvel One-Shot: All Hail the King

They've done it again.  The last One-Shot, "Agent Carter", was the best of all of the MCU short films - until "All Hail the King" was unleashed with the home video release of "Thor: The Dark World".  Primarily a comedy, this is the story of Trevor Slattery (Ben Kingsley), the British actor who was set up by mega mogul Aldritch Killian (Guy Pearce) to portray made up super terrorist "the Mandarin" in "Iron Man 3".  "All Hail" takes place after that movie: Slattery is in jail, and a documentarian played by Scoot McNairy (from "Monsters" and "Argo") is there to interview him.  We learn much about his past acting career, his time as "the Mandarin", and the fact that there are some very bad people in the world who aren't very happy with his portrayal.

Though only fifteen minutes in length, it made me laugh quite a bit.  Kingsley, one of the major highlights of "Iron Man 3", is still in top form, the direction is airtight, Brian Tyler's score is fantastically retro, and there's a very cool cameo appearance over the end credits.  Sure, there's obvious, fanboy-appeasing retconning going on in the plot (complete with cheap shots at angry Internet trolls), but I really don't mind where they're going with it.  It's entertaining.

Captain America: The Winter Soldier

Simply put - it's one of Marvel's best and will likely end up on my Favorite Movies list for 2014.  It ranks right up there with the first "Iron Man" and "The Avengers" in quality.  Heck, it may even be better than those (time will tell).

It's certainly superior to the previous film, "Captain America: The First Avenger".  I liked the original's retro charm and rampant Golden Age morality, but it was definitely a flawed flick.  "The Winter Soldier", while not totally flawless, is so overwhelmingly stuffed with gooey goodness that the flaws don't matter.

What follows is a brief list of Pros and Cons.  I will keep things Spoiler-free for the uninitiated, but keep in mind that the movie has a great many hardcore twists, turns, cameos, shout outs, planted story seeds and plain ole' surprises - I will not ruin it for you.

Cons: There's only one major flaw that kind of irks me - but it's no big thing:  The overall plot of the film involves the timeworn "the enemy comes from within our own government" gambit, one that American action movies have been playing for many years now.  This particular plot concept is getting a little long in the tooth, but "Winter Soldier" ups the ante in terms of stakes and quality of execution.  Plus, it's far too easy to pick out who the main villain is going to be, which doesn't matter in the end because the villain is fantastic.

The 3D is generally well done, but the movie features lots of quick cutting and some "shaky-cam" editing techniques which, while extremely well-utilized, are not entirely conducive to the 3D format.  It's still worth seeing in IMAX 3D, however.

Hummable theme music.  Henry Jackman's score is great and accentuates the movie quite nicely, but there's no "Captain America theme" to whistle as you exit the theater.  The first "Cap" had theme music, so what gives?

Pros: Almost too many to list.

Chris Evans owns the role.  He may be the most morally-centered and "whitebread middle-America" member of the Avengers, but it's precisely those qualities that make him such an interesting character in such an out-of-this-world, shades-of-gray cinematic universe.  He easily out-Supermans Superman in the "Truth, Justice, and the American Way" department.  Plus, the dude can kick some serious ass.

Speaking of ass kicking, the action sequences are perfectly done.  PERFECTLY.  They never outstay their welcome (I'm looking at you, "Man of Steel"), they're punchy, satisfying, breathtaking, and as gloriously old school, in execution, as a modern superhero movie can get.

The cast - unbelievable.  You've got the series regulars (Evans, Scarlett Johannson, Samuel L. Jackson, Cobie Smulders, Hayley Atwell, etc.) proving why they are series regulars in the first place ('cuz they're good).  Then you've got Anthony Mackie (awesome as the Falcon), Frank Grillo (a great, gritty character actor), Emily VanCamp as Agent 13 (there will be more of her in the future), Robert Redford (ROBERT FREAKIN' REDFORD), and Sebastian Stan as The Winter Soldier.  Let me say this - the Winter Soldier is easily one of Marvel's best bad guys.  He may not be as "fun" as Loki, but he absolutely takes no prisoners and is just plain scary.  Add a dash of "Frankenstein's monster"-style pathos to his character, and, voilà - instant three-dimensional character.

It's a fantastic, fun, full throttle movie.  It's not all fist-pumping action, though.  It's thoughtful.  It's surprisingly emotional.  It's funny and charming.  It's scary.  It's far better than "Iron Man 3" and Thor: The Dark World".  It blows everything in the Marvel Cinematic Universe to hell - and I admire that.  "Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D." is going to be very interesting in the coming month, and the stage that's been set for "The Avengers: Age of Ultron", well. . .

Have I said the word 'interesting' yet?

The Wrath of Godzilla, Part 16: Angel On High

Godzilla was dead, and Toho had given the American remake rights to TriStar Pictures.  So what was Japanese movie studio Toho supposed to do now that their monstrous star player had gone to Hollywood?  Well, according to longtime head producer Tomoyuki Tanaka, the answer was to give one of Godzilla's most popular co-stars a series of her very own.

Thus was born the Mothra trilogy.  While still considered to be part of the Heisei series (a.k.a. Series 2) which started in 1984, these films are not connected to the others, story-wise.  They take place in a narrative reality all their own.  Classic series elements like giant monster battles, old- school special effects (provided by veteran effects artist Koichi Kawakita on the first two, and newcomer Kenji Suzuki on Part 3), pro-environmental themes and sequences of furious urban destruction are all here, but there are tonal shifts in play which, according to the producers, were meant to reflect changes in the target audience - Mothra had always appealed more to the women and children of Japan than males.

Gone were the big "military versus monster" battles.  Instead, emphasis was placed on the elements of fantasy, color, humor and familial relationships.  The main human characters were no longer the gruff soldiers, stodgy scientists or plucky reporters of yore - kids were now the lead actors.  Supporting characters were now either parents, guardians, other kids or comic relief yahoos.  The trilogy also has three female characters who appear consistently throughout the films (besides Mothra) - the Elias sisters: Moll (played by Megumi Kobayashi), Lora (Sayaka Yamaguchi in the first two films, Misato Tate in the third), and Belvera (Aki Hano).  As in previous films, Mothra was created by a long-lost ancient civilization to stand watch over all life on Earth.  Moll and Lora are this story's version of the Twin Beauties - tiny humanoids who fly around on a tiny Mothra (Fairy Mothra) and help Mothra keep watch over humankind (and occasionally help by singing a song or two).  Unlike the Beauties, they aren't identical twins (Moll is the wiser older sister, Lora the brash one), so that creepy identical twin vibe is gone, thankfully.  Belvera is the evil sister.  She wears black, causes a lot of trouble and flies around on a mechanical bat dragon named Garugaru, as evil sisters do.

Here's a quick rundown of the trilogy -


Rebirth of Mothra (1996)

Merely called "Mothra" in Japan, "Rebirth" starts out with a logging company unwittingly releasing an ancient monster from its stone prison.  That monster's name is Desghidorah (or "Death Ghidorah), an alien beastie who somewhat resembles the classic monster King Ghidorah.  He came from outer space to suck up all life from Earth.  After nearly destroying the entire Elias race (tiny people who were once the primary humanoid race on the planet) and their fleet of giant guardian moths, Mothra managed to defeat him and seal him away for thousands of years.

As Desghidorah rampages across Japan, Moll and Lora battle Belvera for control of a stone seal (in the form of an amulet) which can lock the monster back up for good, with the children of a logging industrialist caught in the middle.  Mothra, weak from laying an egg earlier in the year, is easily defeated and killed by Desghidorah.  The egg hatches, but the little larvae is unable to stop the evil monster, so he (yes, Mothra junior is male) goes into cocoon phase, re-emerging shortly afterward as Leo (Rainbow Mothra), a newly-designed Mothra with the ability to transform into a swarm of smaller moths at a moment's notice.  He easily defeats Desghidorah and locks him back in prison.  Belvera (who really does not like humans) limps away swearing vengeance while Moll and Lora put the seal back in place.  And they all lived happily ever after.

While "Rebirth of Mothra" is a decent start for the new trilogy, it remains my least favorite one, for a couple of reasons.  First of all, while the old school monster effects are still well done and fun to watch, Toho was starting to experiment heavily with incorporating computer generated effects into their monster epics.  There are a lot of painfully bad comping effects which are hard to watch, especially in the Belvera versus Lora and Moll aerial dogfight scene.  It's cheesy, even for the time, but at least they're somewhat inventively used.  The performances by the kids are also painfully annoying.  I know, I know, they're kids, but seeing as how the child actors in the sequels are far less annoying, well. . . yeah.

Still, it's a fun movie.  It's colorful, fast-paced, and it's more fantastical, lighthearted tone is a nice change of pace in the wake of the doom-and-gloom Godzilla films.  It seems like the filmmakers of "Rebirth" were having some trouble establishing a solid foundation, but the sequels would get it right.  "Rebirth" was directed by newcomer Okihiro Yoneda and written by Masumi Suetani, who continued to write the entire trilogy.  Kudos must be given to composer Toshiyuke Watanabe, who scored the trilogy.  His music is excellent, with hummable themes and great John Williams-esque bombast - easily one of the highlights of these movies.  And, yes, the Mothra song is back (plus two original songs which aren't as memorable).

Rebirth of Mothra II (1997)

Originally called "Mothra 2: The Undersea Battle", the movie begins with an ancient monster named Dagahra rising from the ocean to destroy mankind.  He was created by the long-lost civilization of Ninai Kanai as a means of cleaning up the ocean.  Now that mankind's polluting ways have damaged the sea, Dagahra is out to eliminate the source - humanity.  I like to think of him as one of those mobile pool cleaners gone wrong.

A fuzzy little critter named Ghogo has also emerged from the ocean, along with an ancient temple.  After running afoul of a couple of bumbling (and cat abusing) thieves, he falls into the hands of some kids.  Mothra Leo appears and fights Dagahra, only to get defeated by his swarm of life-sucking starfish.  Moll and Lora need Ghogo to lead them to the city of Ninai Kanai to find a mysterious "treasure" with the ability to stop Dagahra once and for all, so all of them (kids included) head for the risen temple to save the world, hounded all the way by Belvera and the two thieves, who are now under her control.

Well, well (Spoiler Alert), after reaching the temple, it's revealed that cute little Ghogo is the "treasure" they seek (um, thanks for making us come all this way, fuzzball).  Ghogo sacrifices his own life to infuse Mothra Leo with the ancient power of Ninai Kanai.  Leo transforms into his new Aqua Mothra form and destroys Dagahra for good.  The temple sinks back into the ocean, Belvera flies off, fuming, and everyone lives happily ever after.

This is my favorite movie in the trilogy.  It's fun, fast-paced, full of great action and off-the-wall weirdness, and improves on everything from the first movie.  The effects are more refined (even if they're still cheesy by today's standards), the acting, while still over-the-top, is far less annoying (especially from the kids), and the movie has a couple of effective heartstring-tugging moments (like Ghogo's sacrifice).  It's also the funniest movie in the series - maybe even in the entire genre!  I belly laughed a couple of times during this movie (let me say this - Ghogo's pee can instantly heal any wounds).  I don't know how much of this can be attributed to new director Kunio Miyoshi, but that may be a place to start.  "Rebirth II" also features what I think is Watanabe's best score of the three.  Ah, good times. . .


Rebirth of Mothra III (1998)

Here we go, the last one.

"Mothra 3: King Ghidorah Attacks" was the Japanese title of this chapter and, like 1991's "Godzilla Vs. King Ghidorah", it also features a heavy time travel element to go along with the classic villain.  In "Rebirth III", giant golden space dragon King Ghidorah comes to Earth to destroy all life.  Long ago, he killed off the dinosaurs.  Now he's back, and he starts off by imprisoning the children of Japan (and also Lora and Belvera) in a giant energy dome, intending to eat them sometime in the near future.  Mothra Leo arrives to do battle but is easily bested by Ghidorah, who also takes control of Lora's mind, turning her into evil Lora.

Moll decides that the only way to stop Ghidorah is to defeat him in the past, when he's younger and weaker, so she puts her life at risk by using all of her power to open a time portal.  Leo flies to the past and emerges in the age of dinosaurs, where he interrupts a battle between a t-rex and a triceratops and engages young Ghidorah (Prince Ghidorah?) in battle and kills him (blowing off his tail in the process).  Back in the present, Belvera successfully frees Lora's mind, and together they manage to get free of Ghidorah's prison.

But something is wrong.  Ghidorah was killed in the past, but the present timeline remains the same - King Ghidorah then reappears in the present (his severed tail somehow evolved over time into a new Ghidorah - um, okay) and begins to terrorize the world anew.  In the past, a group of prehistoric Mothra larvae seal the weakened Leo in a cocoon - Leo emerges from the cocoon 65 million years later, where he uses his newly gained prehistoric powers to transform into Armor Mothra (encased in metal) and finally destroys Ghidorah in one last, furious battle.  Lora and Belvera then team up to revive the near-dead Moll, all of the children return home, and everyone lives happily ever after - and Belvera flies off, vowing to return, or course.

This is another good one.  The tone of the movie is darker and more somber than the previous two, but it still lies well within the realm of color and fantasy.  Director Okihiro Yoneda returned from the original "Rebirth" and did an excellent job this time around.  Except for some wobbly time travel shenanigans and a couple of out-of-the-blue magic powers (Ghidorah can turn people evil?), it's a good closing chapter for the trilogy.  It's good to see Ghidorah again (although Desghidorah is never mentioned - he's some sort of relative, I assume), and Belvera's switch to "good guy" is a nice turn of events.  My favorite moment in the movie takes place in the past, when the aforementioned triceratops and t-rex temporarily stop fighting in order to watch young Ghidorah and Mothra Leo fight.  All that's missing is for them to be sharing a giant bag of prehistoric popcorn.

I should note that "Rebirth III" has not received any sort of home video release in America.  It's aired on the Sci-Fi Channel (now SyFy) and can be found a couple of places online, but that's it.  Maybe someday. . .

Next time I tackle the 1998 American "Godzilla".  Ugh.